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Here We Go, Maya

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'I want to sire kids with you,' she said without a sign of consternation written over her face.

 I was shook from the inside. Shook that a damsel did want to sire with me. She was kidding, right? Except that she wasn't. From the look of things, she meant every ounce of her speech. She was ready to marry, that is to say, implicitly. 

The tension in my veins hit terra firma. I looked at her frame again as if I had seen her for the first time. She was full of life, and desires, and meat. Her five foot frame, with a ball of steak behind her made my situation impervious. There was no denying her appeal and she knew it. 

'I am game.'  I said without a flinch. 'Let's do this, amor.'

That was in 2016. I was yet to get my act together. I was broke yet people thought I was eking a living and going for the kill. Few people know the feeling in your heart, and mind when people think you have money and you don't. So I was spending nights worrying about money and actually putting some little effort towards earning that shit. The shit that earned you respect in a pool of men and commoners. That shit draws the attention of your local shopkeeper. When you have that shit, the shopkeeper calls your name as you draw closer towards the premise. House girls and wives turn around acknowledging that Mr. Simiyu is here. 

It was torrid that year. No money meant you couldn't do shit. Work, get a few quid, pay rent and utilities, buy food, invite your girl over, coitus, get broke, send your girl away, and start the circle again. Ukiritimba tupu

2016 was supposed to be my year folks- I believed in my mind. It was a year I was supposed to hook up with a job I could draw a good salary, save, buy some property within Nairobi Eastern Metro [read Kamulu], buy a Toyota Vanguard, walk down the aisle with the love of my life and start a family. I was so full of hope and expectation, and I knew it. In this life, it is easier said than done, as is to expect than to actually happen. It was natural to expect good tidings to happen to me. My friends Edu and Anto were in the same page as I as their expectations were behemoth. It was as if school had indoctrinated us into expecting more than we could manage. Managing expectations was something that was not in my mind then. But things change.

Fast forward. It has been a couple of years since life posted a reality check across my walks. I manage expectations pretty brusquely. I think more clearly and less abstractly right now. I am not thinking of owning a property to the East of Nairobi anymore. A small brick house in the jungle somewhere in the vast and pristine Rift Valley could do. A vanguard? A Toyota fielder 2016 model could do - in two years. A couple thousands worth of savings into purchase of good stock? Never mind. My amor and I are going to farm potatoes and corn in the coming planting season. Ain't no giant leap of faith anymore when you have Maya to drag you into the realm of reality. 

Parenting is a challenge I have decided to accept. And acceptance is my new forte. Diapers is what I work and toil for. Sleeping late into the night is what I am getting accustomed to. I have new goals to boot, and getting rich ain't one of them. If I am sound, can fend for my people, afford a few savings and spend money for a living, then, I am good. This is my 2020 vibe yet. 





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